I received a text from my wife’s uncle this morning. It came in at 2:47 AM. “The hospital called Arlene passed.”
Arlene was my wife’s estranged mother. It had been over 20 years since my wife and her mother last spoke. We just found out the day before that she was in the hospital with kidney failure and Lucemea. She was already in a state of acoma. We prayed that she would come out of it enough for them to speak one last time to make what could be could be made right.
Before and during all our married life there had been so much bad history between my wife and her mother. She had caused so much hurt to my wife the times before.
About a month ago Arlene had responded to a post that I had out on LinkedIn, “l want to see Kelly.” I showed it to my wife and she thought “she’s up to her old tricks again.” We gave it no more thought. Now she’s gone. There’s no “do over.” There’s no chance now to make things right.
As I sit here this morning my wife’s still sleeping. I’m so crestfallen. I know I have to tell her when she wakes up and comes down stairs for her coffee. I dread this with all my heart. You see I screwed up. I could have encouraged her, advised her to reach out to her mother. I missed the cue. I missed the opportunity. I feel so sorry and dreadful. My heart hurts for the hurt my wife’s going to feel a few minutes from now. And there’s nothing I can do to fix it. I just was not sensitive enough to get the message.
Life is short. Time is a fleeing commodity.
If you’re in a similar situation now that I had been in just a month or so ago. Don’t make the same mistake I did. As much as you can possibly do, make things right. You may never again have the opportunity. Don’t be like me, or you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.